Serendipity
by Sharkdiver1980
Summary: After a chance meeting in London with an old classmate during a semester abroad, Anastasia Steele and Mia Grey strike up a reluctant friendship. When Ana is introduced to Mia's Billionaire brother Christian Grey at a corporate party, what will happen when the shy bookworm discovers his secret? Romance/humor, [Anastasia/Christian] rated M for future Chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: I normally write HP fanfic, (Tom Riddle and Hermione for the win!) but I recently read Fifty Shades, and though I have my own beef with those books, I do really like the characters. Maybe it's because Christian is a fucked up sociopath like Tom Riddle, and Anastasia is a bookworm like Hermione…hmm…Not sure what this says about me! Anyway, if you happen to read any of my other works, you'll see that I like to write humor/smut/crackfic/dramas…and I suppose this is no different. Enjoy at your own risk, I am not responsible if you pee your pants laughing.**

 **Also, I took liberties and changed some factoids to suit the purpose of my fic (i.e, Ana works at Starbucks, not Clayton's, Only Christian was adopted, etc...I did this on purpose, and because...FICTION.**

* * *

 _Serendipity_ _[ser-_ _uh_ _n-_ _dip_ _-i-tee]_ _/_ _ˌ_ _s_ _ɛ_ _r_ _ə_ _n_ _ˈ_ _d_ _ɪ_ _p_ _ɪ_ _ti/_

 _Noun: an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident._

 **oOo0oOo**

One week. She had been in London, the city of her dreams, for exactly one week, when Mia Grey walked into the new fancy Starbucks on Lambeth. This was hell. It had to be; of all the people who could have walked in, it had to be _her_. Anastasia was behind the counter covered in sticky caramel syrup, thinking about who she could have pissed off in a former life when she was shaken from her thoughts by the insistent tapping of fingernails on the swanky granite countertop.

"Welcome to Starbucks, what can I get for you?" she said through gritted teeth, plastering a fake smile on her lips.

"Anastasia? Anastasia Steele, is that _you_?!" Mia asked in her nasally voice with her obviously fake Spanish accent.

"Yep it's me. What can I get you?" Ana replied with a sigh.

"Oh my God, Girl! What are you doing here?! This is crazy, right? I mean…it's London! Are you working here now?" Mia gushed pretending not to notice Ana rolling her eyes so hard that she could practically see the back of her skull.

"So it would seem. I'm pretty sure Starbucks doesn't let random people behind the counter to make their own coffee." Ana quipped sarcastically.

"Haha! Girl, you are so funny! We totally need to catch up! I mean, what are the odds, right?" Mia laughed

 _Oh God, no._

"Yeah, I've been really busy-" Ana began to say before Mia cut her off.

"I'm not taking 'No' for an answer! We'll do lunch! Oh my god, how funny is this?" Mia continued oblivious to Ana's attempt at blowing her off.

"Well, I work a lot, so-" Ana tried again

"Sunday. I'm taking you out for brunch on Sunday. Where are you staying?" Mia prodded, clearly not taking the hint.

Ana sighed, "I'm renting a small flat here in Vauxhall, over on Langley. Number twenty."

Somewhere in the line forming behind Mia, someone coughed loudly, indicating their displeasure at having to wait.

"Brilliant! I'll pick you up at ten-thirty on Sunday then! Oh, and I suppose I should order my coffee…I'll just take a Grande caramel macchiato with soy, no whip, extra caramel please."

Ana's eye began to twitch. Of course she wouldn't want a _regular_ coffee. Fucking Mia Grey.

 **oOo0oOo**

It was finally noon, and Antonella had thankfully shown up on time for her shift, which meant that Ana could return to her flat. After clocking out, she removed her apron and did her best to ignore the fact that her arm hair was glued to her skin in some places because of the caramel that managed to get _everywhere_. On her walk home, she lost herself in her thoughts of how much her life had changed since high school. Back in Seattle, Ana had attended Lakeside, which was one of Seattle's elite private schools. Truth be told, she didn't belong there; that was where all the well-to-do families of Seattle sent their children, because _God forbid_ , they attend public school. Ana's family, if it could even be called that at this point, wasn't rich; in fact, Ana's step-father, Ray, had taken a second job just to help pay for her tuition. Ana's mother, the gold-digger that she was, took off with one of her sugar-daddy's when Ana was ten, leaving her with Ray, who had adopted her as a child. The only thing her mother had been good for, was sending a child support check every month.

To say that Ana never fit in at Lakeside was an understatement. She couldn't relate to any of the other kids in her classes, and It had been the source of more than a few arguments between her and Ray. Ana felt guilty that he spent so much money to send her to a school that she really didn't want to go to, when her best friend Jose' was stuck in in the public school system. Jose' had always dreamed of going to Lakeside, but unlike Ana, his family couldn't afford the Tuition payments. So, in an attempt to help Ray where she could, she took a job at the local Starbucks when she was sixteen, and worked there all through her high school years, and most of her college years. After graduating with high honors from Lakeside, she was accepted at Washington State University at Vancouver into the British Literature program. On the weekends, she returned home in her trusty Volkswagen Beetle she had affectionately named 'Wanda', and picked up a few shifts at Starbucks for some extra money throughout the week. Looking back, Ray had been right; her attendance at Lakeside, and the full academic scholarship she received to Washington State would open the doors she needed for a successful career in publishing.

Mia Grey had been the quintessential _queen_ of Lakeside. Mia was everything Anastasia wasn't; blond, tall, thin, and popular, while Ana had mousy-brown hair, was relatively short, curvy, and was decidedly un-popular. While Mia went to parties and shopped, Ana read books, and _worked_. Predictably, Mia was crowned home-coming queen, while Ana wasn't even asked to prom. Truthfully, Mia had never been cruel to Ana, in fact, she had never been _anything_ to her; which is why the whole pretending to be long lost friends thing was so gag-worthy. The only true friends Ana ever had, were Jose and Kate. Jose she had known since she was little, as Ray and Jose's dad were old army buddies. Kate she met much later at Washington State when they were paired up for a project in journalism class. Kate had always known she wanted to go into Journalism, and she had the attitude to match. Ana had known instantly, when she heard Kate tell one of the guys in their class to 'fuck off', that they would become BFF's, and so they did. By the start of her third year, she and Kate had gotten an apartment together in Portland while Kate interned at her Father's Newspaper, _the Seattle Times_.

Traveling to London had always been Ana's dream; she had grown up reading books by Jane Austen, Charlotte Bronte, and Thomas Hardy, hoping that one day, she would be able to travel to the places they wrote about, and maybe, _just maybe_ , find a little bit of romance along the way. The opportunity came in her final year, when one of the biggest publishing houses in the world, Random House, agreed to take her on as an intern. Initially, she was going to turn it down, rationalizing that there was no way she could go, as it was far too expensive, not to mention it would involve moving to another country, until Kate slapped some sense into her.

Like, she literally slapped her across the face and told her that if she didn't grab that opportunity with both hands, that she would drag her by her granny panties to the airport herself.

 _God she missed Kate_.

By the time Ana reached her flat, she dropped her bag on the chair and headed straight for the shower. After scrubbing her skin raw to remove the dried caramel and crusty milk foam, she stepped out and wrapped a towel around herself before collapsing on the bed and grabbing the tv remote. The channel was still on E! from when she fell asleep the night before watching the True Hollywood Story on the Golden Girls, and she looked up in surprise when she heard the name 'Christian Grey' to see a paparazzi photo of him wearing a perfectly tailored suit looking unbelievably gorgeous with some dark haired waif clinging to his arm.

One more reason to loathe Mia Grey; even her family members were gorgeous. Christian was one of Mia's older brothers, who also happened to be the billionaire CEO of Grey Enterprises, Holdings. Unlike Mia and Elliot Grey, Christian was adopted at a young age, or so she read in _In Touch Weekly_. Christian was six years older than Mia, so Ana had never actually met him since they weren't in school at the same time.

Her phone suddenly buzzed, and she muted the volume on the tv, and answered it.

"Hey fuckface."

Hearing Kate's voice on the other end instantly lifted her spirits.

"Oh thank God it's you. You won't believe what happened to me today." Ana sighed dramatically into the phone

"Yeah, it's only eight am here, and I haven't had nearly enough coffee if you're about to tell me that someone came into Starbucks and masturbated on you."

" _What?!_ No…"

"Oh…ok, well that's good, can't be that bad then." Kate said chuckling.

" _Mia Grey_ strolled into Starbucks today." Ana said unceremoniously.

Ana of course, had told Kate _all_ about Mia Grey, and how she had been the bane of her existence during her high school years.

"Oh fuck. I'm so sorry…that kinda makes the public masturbator seem like the lesser evil."

"Tell me about it. She was all, 'Oh. Em. Gee, Ana! It's been like, forever! Let's get together!'" Ana said doing a pretty realistic impersonation of Mia's nasally voice.

"Girl, she didn't…What did you say? Tell me you told her to fuck off..."

"Actually, I tried to, but she kind of insisted on taking me out for brunch. Like what the hell is that? I was practically invisible to her all through high school, but now suddenly because she runs into me in a foreign country she wants to be my new BFF?…Shit, you know what this is? I'm a fucking charity case. That's what this is. Poor little Ana having to actually _work_ for a living." Ana said shaking her head.

"What a bitch. I really miss you, you know? If I was over there, I'd tell her to take her money and shove it up her ass. My little Ana ain't nobody's charity case!" Kate shouted into the phone protectively.

"Thanks Kate, you know I love you. When I write my first novel, I'm totally dedicating it to you!" Ana said laughing.

"Yeah, well, you better, you probably wouldn't even be over there right now if I hadn't literally slapped some sense into that pretty little head of yours." Kate chuckled

"Yeah, that really hurt by the way."

"Suck it up, buttercup. That was opportunity knocking." Kate said, and Ana could picture her smiling on the other end of the line.

"Thank you…I mean it. I never said it, but seriously…Thanks." Ana said

"You don't have to thank me…you would have done the same for me." Kate answered, before clearing her throat, "Well, I actually have to get to work, I just wanted to give you a quick call to see how you were."

"I'm good. I'll keep you posted on the Mia situation. Ten bucks says she completely blows me off."

"You're on. I bet she'll show up, because honestly, she's just _that_ fucking annoying." Kate laughed.

"Alright, well, give my love to Jose if you happen to see him, and take care of yourself." Ana said before ending the call.

God she missed Kate. Being in a foreign country, and knowing absolutely no one was daunting…though she supposed that wasn't technically true, since _Mia fucking Grey_ was in town.

 **oOo0oOo**

Sunday morning rolled around, and she was certain that Mia had forgotten all about her five minutes after she left Starbucks that day, but to her surprise and annoyance, the door buzzer sounded.

 _Crap. Maybe if she ignored it she'd go away?_

"Ana! Ana I know you're in there, it's Mia!"

 _Then again, maybe not._

She pressed the button to open the outside door, and picked up her jacket and bag, waiting for Mia to come up. When Mia stepped in, she was wearing a pair of those ridiculous overly large sunglasses, and a pair of heels that made her already tall frame rise to freakishly tall proportions. Standing next to her, Anna sort of gained a whole new respect for little people.

"You're not wearing _that_ are you?" Mia said pointing in Ana's general direction.

Ana looked down at the navy blue skirt and flowered blouse that she was wearing with a scowl.

"We have plenty of time for you to change, let's see what you have in that closet of yours." Mia said pushing past Ana into where she assumed her bedroom would be, and made a beeline to her closet.

"Nope, no, absolutely not…Ana, do you own _anything_ that doesn't make you look like a Grandma?"

Ana stood gaping at Mia like a fish.

"Nevermind, we're going shopping." Mia said putting her sunglasses back on and dragging Ana out of her flat behind her.

Just outside of her building, sat a dark gray BMW, which Mia walked over to, and climbed into the driver's side.

"Mia, I don't have the money to buy a whole new wardrobe." Ana said flatly, crossing her arms over her chest beside the car.

"Nonsense, It's my treat." Mia said as she pushed the door open

The words 'Charity case' swirled through her mind again, but before she could open her mouth, Mia held up her hand

"Listen, before you say no, just hear me out."

Intrigued as to what she could possibly say, Ana got in the car and turned towards Mia expectantly.

"Look, I know we didn't get off on the right foot in high school, but the truth is, I always kind of envied you." Mia admitted quietly.

" _You_ envied _me_?" Ana said in disbelief, looking at Mia as if she sprouted a second head.

"Yes! You're brilliant! I bet you could have gotten into any school you wanted with your grades. Did you know that the only reason I am here right now is because _my brother_ hired me? Do you know how pathetic that is?" Mia said shaking her head and giving a mirthless chuckle.

"Wait…you work for Christian?" Ana asked

Mia smiled, "Yes, do you know him?"

Ana blushed, "No, not personally, no."

"Oh. I thought maybe…no, of course not." Mia began, and then waived off the idea instantly, as if it weren't a possibility.

"You thought _what_?" Ana asked

Mia chuckled, "I know it sounds silly, but I thought maybe you and he had _dated_ …I mean, you're totally his type, except well…" Mia trailed off, glancing down at Ana's hideous blouse.

"No, I've never met him." Ana said trying not to sound totally offended.

"Well, anyway, I don't really know anyone here and I'd like us to be friends…I'd really like to make it up to you, if you'll let me. Sort of a do-over, you know?" Mia said hopefully.

Ana sighed. She felt weird allowing Mia to buy her clothes, but truth be told, she had felt a bit out of her depth at Random House with the clothes she had, and Mia certainly could afford it, so…

"Ok. But let's not go crazy." Ana relented.

"Fantastic! I've always wanted to be a personal shopper! This is going to be so much fun!" Mia exclaimed as Ana rolled her eyes and buckled her seatbelt.

Lord, help her for agreeing to this…


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: Oh my god, you guys, I was so not expecting such a huge response to just the first chapter! Over 800 views and 27 favorites! THANK YOU! I am so humbled that you guys like my work, and I hope you all get a good laugh out of this chapter, I know I did. I'm actually having a lot of fun writing my version of Ana...I think we do get glimpses of her in the book/movie, and so I decided to bring her out a little bit more. Well, here is the next chapter! Thank you all again! xoxo**

* * *

"I can't walk in these." Ana said as she wobbled on the six-inch stilettos that Mia had bugged her to try on.

"They're Louboutin's. Every woman should have a pair of these in her closet." Mia said absently as she held up a red cocktail dress and pushed it into Ana's arms.

"Mia, when the hell will I _ever_ wear this? I can't wear this to work." Ana groused

Mia waved her off dismissively, " _Hello_! Holiday party! Honestly Ana, I'm sure there will be an occasion at some point this year where you'll thank me for suggesting it."

After two hours of trying on clothes and attempting to walk in heels, Ana was beginning to get annoyed.

"Fine, but after this can we _please_ go get something to eat? I'm starving." Ana said as she stepped back into the changing room for what would hopefully be the last time.

"Yes, yes, I know a great little bistro right around the corner, you'll love it. Then we can go do something about your hair." Mia chuckled as she examined her perfectly manicured nails.

"My hair? What's wrong with my hair?" Ana snapped through the closed door as she shimmied into the slinky red cocktail dress.

"Well, nothing is _wrong_ with it per se, it just needs a little help. It's just so… _plain_."

Ana studied her reflection in the mirror. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had her hair cut, and honestly, it was looking a bit flat these days, especially when paired with the slinky Dolce and Gabbana Cocktail dress and Christian Louboutin stillettos she was currently sporting.

"Fine." Ana relented as she stepped out of the changing room to show Mia the dress.

Mia gasped, "Ana! Look at you! Who knew you had such a hot little body hiding away under those frumpy clothes!"

Ana scowled, "Gee, thanks."

Mia laughed, "I meant it as a compliment, you're really pretty, you should have more confidence in yourself, you know?"

Ana blushed, not used to receiving such compliments, "Thanks…um…I'll work on it I guess."

Mia nodded, "Alright, well get changed and we'll go get something to eat."

 _About goddamn time!_

Ana slipped back into the changing room to put her ugly clothes back on and her well-worn flats, and took a long look at herself in the mirror. To her surprise, Mia was right. She looked like a completely different person. With a new hairstyle and a bit of makeup, maybe she could stand next to Mia and _not_ feel like Dorothy Zbornak on a _good_ day.

 **oOo0oOo**

"So tell me, how did you end up here in London?" Mia asked as she dug into her quinoa salad.

Ana wiped her mouth with her napkin as she set down her burger, and swallowed her food before she answered.

"After high school, I got accepted to Washington State into their British Literature program. I kept my job at Starbucks part time working weekends for some extra cash, and an opportunity opened up to intern here in London at a publishing house, so I took it. Luckily, Starbucks let me transfer to their Lambeth location so I could at least guarantee some income to supplement the little bit I'd earn while interning. After this semester, just before Christmas, I'll be heading back to Seattle to finish up my degree so I can graduate in the spring. What about you? What sort of work are you doing at Grey Enterprises, Holdings?"

Mia blushed and took a sip of her sparkling water, "I'm the senior director of corporate events."

Ana furrowed her brows, "What exactly does that entail?"

Mia laughed, "Basically, I plan all the parties for Grey Enterprises."

Ana's eyebrows rose in surprise, "There's actually a _position_ for that?"

Mia chuckled, "Of course! There are over one hundred-thousand employees! Trying to coordinate and plan those events, is a full time job, let me tell you."

"So is that why you're in London? Planning a party?" Ana asked as she popped a french fry in her mouth.

"Yeah, Christian asked me to organize a welcoming party for their newest acquisition, which is based here in London. It made sense for me to stay on here until the event to make sure everything goes smoothly."

Ana nodded.

"Oh my god, I totally just had the best idea! _You_ should come to the party!" Mia said excitedly.

 _Wait, what?!_

"Mia, I can't just crash a corporate party…" Ana argued.

"Nonsense! I'll add you to the guest list! It'll be great! If nothing else, it'll give you an opportunity to wear that new dress!" Mia chuckled as Ana rolled her eyes.

"When is it going to be?" Ana asked, surprised that she was even halfway considering it.

"Next month; this will be so great!" Mia explained while pulling out her cell phone and tapping in a reminder to herself.

Ana sighed and finished her burger, knowing that she probably wouldn't be able to get out of it, seeing as Mia just spent a small fortune on her.

"Are you finished? I just got a text from Alejandro that he's ready for us." Mia said as she slipped her phone back into her bag

"Wait, who's Alejandro?" Ana asked as she ate the last bite of her burger and wiped her mouth.

Mia rolled her eyes, " _Duh_ , he's your stylist, now let's go!"

Her stylist? She had a _stylist_ now?

"Just remember, if you can't understand him, just nod and smile, that's what I do. Oh, and if he asks if you want the 'Sbiancamento Anale', make sure you say NO." Mia offered.

Ana looked at her in confusion, "What is that, some sort of hairstyle?"

Mia stopped walking and turned to look at Ana as she bit back a smirk, "Um…no. Anal Bleaching."

"Oh. Right, _of course_ ….because most people stop in for a quick ass bleaching while getting a trim." Ana said sarcastically as she shook her head laughing.

"Just make sure you say No!" Mia laughed as she led Ana to the salon where Alejandro, Asshole bleacher extraordinaire, awaited them.

 **oOo0oOo**

"You owe me ten bucks." Kate said laughing after listening to Ana's story of how her afternoon with Mia went.

"Kate, he bleached my _asshole_ , and all your worried about is your ten bucks?!" Ana snapped into the phone

"To be fair, Mia did warn you. Why the hell did you follow him into the back room after she told you that?" Kate asked laughing.

"He asked if I wanted to be waxed! That part, I understood. I thought he was just going to do a simple bikini wax." Ana explained.

"So how did you go from getting your cooch waxed to having your asshole bleached?!" Kate managed to get out between her laughter.

"Well, he started on my bikini area, and just kept going! I'm completely _bald_ down there, Kate! Next thing I know, he grabs both my ankles, flips me over, and spreads my cheeks." Ana complained which only caused Kate to laugh even harder.

"It's not funny! Do you have any idea how much that stings? I'm literally afraid to poop."

"Stop! I can't!" Kate managed to breathe as she cackled into the phone.

After a few minutes, she finally got her laughter under control.

"So are you seriously considering going to this party?" Kate asked

"Well, it would be kind of shitty if I blew her off after all the money she spent on me, I kind of feel like I have to go. Honestly though, she's not as bad as I thought. Once I got to know her a bit, she was actually pretty easy to talk to."

"No…no, no, no, Ana, she's a _Helen_. Next thing you know, she'll be trying to take my place as your best friend, throwing parties with giant cookies, and giving out puppies as party favors." Kate scolded.

"Wait, did you just make a _Bridesmaids_ reference?" Ana chuckled.

"Yes. It was totally on point though; I mean you _did_ get your asshole bleached."

"Ugh, You're right. I still need to go to the party though, I already told her I would." Ana sighed.

"Well, you only live once, at least there will be an open bar, right?" Kate chuckled.

"Yep, I'm sure Mister Megabucks can afford the good stuff, too." Ana smirked.

"Mister Megabucks? You mean Christian Grey, _The_ Christian Grey will be there?" Kate asked in awe.

"I would imagine so, it is his company, after all." Ana said shrugging.

"He is so _hot_! Forget what I said earlier, you totally have to go to this party." Kate gushed.

Ana snorted, "Kate, it's not as if he'd even look twice at me. I mean, come on, have you seen the women he's dated? Keira Knightly, Kate, he dated _Keira friggin' Knightly_."

"For what, like five minutes? You're every bit as pretty as she is, not to mention a lot smarter." Kate snapped.

"Anyway, he's probably a dick. Men that beautiful usually are." Ana said trying to end the conversation. Christian Grey was out of her league, and that's all there was to it.

"Probably," Kate agreed, "Well, try to have a good time anyway. How are things going at Random House?"

"Great, actually. I have gotten to read some incredible manuscripts that I otherwise probably never would have had the chance to read; I even suggested to my boss that he consider publishing one of them."

"What's your boss like? For some reason I am picturing an older stately British gentleman like Ian McKellen." Kate laughed.

"Not quite, actually he's American. His name is Jack Hyde, and he's more of a Bill Weasley than a Gandalf."

"Huh…so he's a ginger then?" Kate asked

Ana chuckled, "Yep. Even has the ponytail and the earring."

"Wow…that's um…interesting" Kate trailed off, not knowing how to respond to that, so she changed course, "he's nice though, right? Not giving you a hard time, is he?"

"He's alright, I guess, could be worse, I suppose. I think it helps that I stop at Starbucks on my way in and bring him a coffee every morning."

"Well, I'm glad things are going so well…Oh! I almost forgot to tell you! I ran into Jose last week; he's got a show coming up in Seattle right around Christmas time! I think you'll be home by then…He'd be over the moon if you surprised him!" Kate said.

Ana beamed, "Oh my God! That's fantastic! He finally did it! Of course I'll be there, I wouldn't miss it!"

"Awesome, well, duty calls…If I don't get a chance to talk to you before then, tell me how the party goes!"

"Promise! Love you, Katydid."

"Love you too, Ana banana."

 **oOo0oOo**

Despite not eating lunch earlier in the day, Ana felt like she was about to throw up as the black shiny car pulled up in front of the Bulgari hotel. To say that this place was swanky was an extreme understatement. The valet came around to open the car door, and she picked up her clutch and shimmied as gracefully as possible out of the car while wearing that skin tight red Dolce and Gabbana dress that Mia had talked her in to. After making sure she wouldn't trip over her Louboutin's, she took a deep breath and walked into the lobby.

"Where can I direct you, Miss?" one of the staff greeted as she stepped inside, and she cleared her throat to say, "Grey Enterprises Party?"

"Certainly, Miss. Your name please?" the man asked kindly from behind the black shiny desk.

"Anastasia Steele."

 _God, she hoped Mia hadn't forgotten to add her to the list! How embarrassing would it be if she got kicked out!_

"Excellent, here are your keys, you'll be staying on the fourteenth floor, Suite number 77, just below the penthouse, if you'd like to freshen up before the party. The party will be in the Ballroom."

Ana looked down at the key card he handed her in confusion, "Wait, I have a room?"

"Yes, Miss Steele."

"Oh…alright then." Ana said surprised. She was a bit annoyed that Mia hadn't bothered to tell her, as she hadn't brought any of her things, but she supposed it was nice to not have to worry about getting back to her flat later if she had too much to drink. It couldn't hurt to have a look-see at the room before heading down to the party.

She stepped into the elevator, which was probably larger than her flat, and hit the button for the fourteenth floor. When the door chimed only a moment later, she looked up and froze, as none other than Christian Grey stepped inside.

"Going up?" He asked politely as he reached out to hit the button for his floor, and she wasn't surprised to see that he hit button fifteen; the penthouse.

Not knowing what to say, she gave him a shy smile as he studied her.

"I don't recall seeing you before, are you new?" he asked curiously as he continued gazing at her with his piercing grey eyes.

"Um…no. I'm just a guest." She stammered, not sure if she should tell him that she was actually invited by his sister.

"I see." He said as the door chimed once again before opening on the fourteenth floor.

"Well, this is me." Ana said awkwardly and she made to step out of the elevator, when the unthinkable happened. The heel of her outrageously expensive Louboutin stilettos got caught in the elevator door, causing her to stumble forward.

She was caught by a pair of strong arms just before she hit the impeccably polished marble floor, and was brought slowly back to her feet.

"Are you alright, Miss…?" Christian asked trying to bite back a smirk.

Ana blushed to the roots of her hair, completely mortified.

"Steele. Anastasia Steele. I'm fine. Thanks for that." She said as she attempted to straighten her dress.

"It was my _pleasure_ , Miss Steele." He said before stepping back into the elevator with a small smile.

Just before the doors closed, he nodded; "Anastasia."

"Christian." She said without thinking, noticing how his eyes widened slightly before the doors slid shut.

'Oh my _God_ , how embarrassing.' She moaned as she made her way towards her room.

When she heard the lock click open, she opened the door, and her jaw hit the floor. Simply put, this room, no, _apartment_ , was stunning. The décor and furniture probably cost more than her tuition payments. She spun around giggling like a child and dropped down onto the king sized bed. She was definitely sleeping here tonight, even if she hadn't brought a change of clothes.

A knock suddenly sounded on her door, and she figured it was probably Mia.

"I'm coming, hold your horses!" she yelled as she strode through the living room to open the door.

One of the hotel staff stood on the other side of the door holding a large bouquet of red roses.

"Delivery for a Miss Anastasia Steele."

"That's me." She said in confusion as the man swept inside and placed the large vase of roses on the table.

"Um, who are these from?" she asked looking to see if there was a card.

"Compliments of Mister Grey, Ma'am." The man answered and swept out of the room just as quickly as he had entered.

Probably just a 'welcoming gift' to everyone who had booked a room as a guest of Geay Enterprises, she thought.

She plucked up the small card and opened it, expecting to see some generic message, when she gasped in surprise:

 _ **A**_ _ **nastasia,**_

 _ **It was a pleasure to meet you; I look forward to seeing you at the party.**_

 _ **~Christian**_

 _Holy Shit._

She just got flowers from Christian hot-billionaire-CEO Grey. Take _that_ Keira Knightly.

After taking a few deep breaths to calm down, she decided she should probably head down to the party. What if he was there?

 _Of course he would be there, it's his party, dumbass!_

She'd play it cool. Thank him graciously for the flowers if she saw him, and not act like a complete lunatic. Seems simple enough.

After re-checking her hair and makeup for the millionth time, she tucked her room key into her clutch, and headed down to the ballroom.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: Holy crap you guys! Over 2000 views and 49 favorites only after 2 chapters! THANK YOU! I hope you all like this chapter, it was fun to write! xo**

* * *

"Ana!" Mia cried as she made her way over to her. She was dressed impeccably in a black satin floor-length Marchesa gown, looking every bit in her element just as she had in high school.

"Mia, this place is incredible!" Ana whispered once she was close enough.

"Did you find your room alright? I had them put you in the suite next to mine, I hope that was alright." Mia said as her eyes scanned the ball room, most likely making sure everything was in place.

"Yes, that was unexpected, you really didn't have to do that, you know, but thank you." Ana said seriously.

Mia waved her off, "Don't thank me, thank Christian; this is all courtesy of Grey Enterprises." Mia chuckled.

Ana's stomach flipped at the mention of Mia's brother; should she tell her what happened?

Just before Ana could open her mouth to speak, Mia interrupted and looked over Ana's shoulder.

"Oh! Speak of the Devil, here he is now. Christian! Over here!"

 _Oh God…_

Her stomach did another little flip, and she blushed thinking about the roses he had sent to her room only minutes ago.

"Mia. Miss Steele." His smooth voice came from behind her, so she turned around to give him a polite smile.

"Wait…have you two met?" Mia asked gesturing between Ana and Christian.

Christian smirked looking over at Ana while she blushed once again, "Briefly, yes; in the elevator."

"Oh… _oh for fuck's sake_ …will you excuse me a moment?" Mia said quickly as she dashed off to go handle some crisis near the kitchen, leaving Ana alone with Christian.

"Are you enjoying the party, Miss Steele?" Christian asked, his grey eyes burning into hers in a way that made her feel like she couldn't breathe.

Before she could answer or thank him for the roses, a man wearing an ear piece approached him from behind and whispered something in his ear.

"Excuse me, Miss Steele." He said nodding to her politely

"Ana. It's just…Ana." She managed to say just as he walked away.

One of the waiters approached, "Champagne, Miss?"

"Thank you." She said as she picked up a glass from the tray. Alcohol sounded _very_ good right now, considering the ball of nerves she had become after less than five minutes in that man's presence.

"Sorry about that, they were supposed to serve the champagne with the appetizers, and the Sauvignon Blanc with the Main course. All fixed now." Mia said nodding towards Ana's glass of champagne.

"So, what happened in the elevator?" Mia said as she narrowed her eyes curiously at Ana.

Ana blushed again, "Nothing, why?" she said a little too quickly.

"I saw the way my brother was looking at you…" Mia said as she tapped her French manicured nail against her chin.

"How was he looking at me?" Ana said pretending she hadn't noticed.

Mia raised one perfectly sculpted eyebrow, "Oh please, don't tell me you didn't notice. He was totally checking you out." Mia chuckled.

"No, I'm sure he was just being polite." Ana protested.

Mia snorted, "Really, Steele, for someone so smart, I think you missed the plot. He hasn't been able to take his eyes off you since you walked in." Mia said nodding towards where Christian stood on the other side of the room, talking to a group of men in suits.

"Ana?" another male voice came from behind her, and her eyes widened in recognition.

"Jack?" she said in surprise as she turned around to see none other than her boss, Jack Hyde. "What are you doing here?" she asked without thinking.

"I could ask the same of you." He said raising his eyebrow at her expectantly.

"Oh, forgive me; Jack, this is Mia Grey, Mia, this is my boss, Jack Hyde, one of the editors at Random House."

"We've met." Jack said nodding at Mia.

"You still haven't answered my question, Ana, what are you doing here?" Jack asked again.

 _Crap, was she in trouble? Wait…if Jack was here then…_

She looked at Mia in shock, "Did Christian _buy_ Random House?" Ana asked in surprise, covering her mouth with her hand as the pieces clicked into place.

"Yes, didn't I mention that?" Mia asked looking at Ana nervously.

"No! You didn't!" Ana snapped, feeling foolish. So while she wasn't technically _gate crashing_ the party, it was intended for only editors and senior executives…not lowly interns.

"I expect you can keep this quiet until the news has been made official? Look, if anyone asks, you're with me." He said quietly as he slipped his arm around her waist.

 _Whoa, what?_

"Uh, I don't think…" Ana began trying to extricate herself when she heard Christian's voice from behind her.

"Is there a problem here?" he said icily, his eyes narrowed, and his gaze focused on Jacks hand resting on her hip.

"Of course not, my date and I were just about to get a drink." Jack said quickly, pulling Ana closer to him in a gesture that was oddly possessive.

As uncomfortable as the situation was, Ana didn't want to risk causing a problem between her boss and what she supposed was now her boss's, boss's, boss. She wasn't really even supposed to _be_ there.

A look of cool indifference was on Christian's face in an instant as he glanced over at her.

"I see, forgive the intrusion. Please, enjoy the party." He said before striding away, masking a look of disappointment.

Her stomach dropped as she watched Christian walk away, knowing any chance she may have had with him, no matter how minute, was now gone.

"You know, I'm not feeling so good." Ana said placing her hand over her stomach. "I think I'm just going to go back to my room." She said

"Let me walk you…" Jack offered, and the tone of his voice made her skin crawl.

"No, no please…you should stay and enjoy the party. I'm just going to go lay down for a bit." She said feeling a sense of relief as soon as she was away from him.

She felt a bit dizzy from not having eaten since breakfast, and she consoled herself by deciding she would order room service while luxuriating in the gigantic bath tub in her room.

She stepped into the elevator, and hit button fourteen. Just as the doors were almost closed, a hand caught the door and pushed them open before quickly slipping inside.

Ana looked up in surprise as she bit down on her bottom lip, to see Christian gazing down at her with an unreadable expression, a muscle twitching in his jaw.

"You're biting your lip."

She instantly pulled her lip from between her teeth, and furrowed her brows, "What are you doing here, Christian?"

"You're not with Hyde…" Christian said, it was more of a statement than a question.

"No, he's just my boss-" Ana began before she was pushed back against the wall of the elevator, with Christian holding her hands above her head as his lips crashed into hers possessively.

Rational thought fled her brain as his mouth devoured hers, his tongue gliding against hers in a way that made heat pool between her thighs.

Just as quickly as it began, the elevator chimed again and he stepped away from her, clearing his throat.

"I believe this is your floor, Miss Steele."

"Ana…it's just Ana." She said breathlessly as she gazed back up at him with a dazed expression.

"Do you need any help to your room?" he asked smirking at her knowingly.

 _Yes, please._

"Oh, I…I think I can manage." She said stupidly as she watched the elevator doors begin to slide closed once again.

"Goodnight, Anastasia." Christian said, not taking his eyes off her until the doors closed.

"Goodnight Christian." she whispered still standing there in the hallway like a fool.

 **oOo0oOo**

"I'm really sorry about last night, I totally thought you knew about the merger." Mia said as she plucked a scone off of the platter and set it on her plate.

"No, it's fine, honestly, all those meetings at Random House during the last few weeks really should have tipped me off…I'm just hoping I still have a job come Monday morning." Ana said as she rested her chin on her hand and traced the rim of her teacup with her finger.

"Of course you'll have a job, they can't fire you for attending a company party you were _invited_ to, I'm pretty sure that would be illegal." Mia chuckled.

"How did Jack seem after I left?" Ana asked, thankful that she hadn't run into him again since he had all but insinuated he had wanted to sleep with her.

"I caught him glaring at Christian a few times, but later in the night, I did see him leaving with a dark haired woman, so he couldn't have been _that_ upset."

Gross.

"Well, hopefully things won't be weird; I still have to work there for another five months." Ana sighed.

"I wouldn't worry about it, though I should tell you, I think you made quite the impression on my brother…"Mia said cryptically as she took a bite of her scone.

Ana's ears perked up at the mention of Christian.

"Oh?"

"Yeah; it was weird…not long after you left, he asked me if you were really Jack's guest. I laughed, of course, and told him that Jack was your boss, and that you had no idea he would even be there."

Ana's eyes widened.

"And then just like that, he rushed off." Mia said rolling her eyes, "Honestly, he's such a control freak. He probably just wanted to make sure you hadn't gate crashed or something."

Ana blushed thinking about how he had shown up and kissed her senseless against the elevator wall.

"That is weird." Ana said, not wanting to admit to Mia what had really happened between her and Christian.

"Well, he's always been a little weird, so I guess this shouldn't surprise me." She chuckled.

This bit of info had her intrigued.

"Weird like how?" she asked, hoping she only sounded mildly interested.

Mia waved dismissively, "Oh, like just…really, really, private. He always kept his bedroom door locked, not that I _wanted_ to know what went on in there, mind you."

Knowing how intrusive Mia could be, Ana didn't necessarily categorize that as 'weird'.

"Also, he like…used to fight a lot."

Now that was unexpected.

"Christian used to get into fights?" she asked, taking another sip of her tea.

"Yeah, all the time. He got kicked out of four schools before he finally got his act together. My parents almost sent him to military school." She said shaking her head, and then looked down at her phone as an incoming text chimed.

"Oh, I have to run; well, I'm sorry about last night, but I'll call you this week, okay? Maybe we can check out this club I've been dying to go to." Mia said as she stood and slipped her phone back into her bag.

"Sure, but it's my treat this time." Ana said giving Mia a genuine smile.

As she watched Mia stride away, she couldn't stop thinking about Christian, and how far removed the idea of him being a brawler seemed from his impeccable image.

Finishing her tea, Ana noticed the time.

"Shit!" her shift at Starbucks started in 35 minutes; 10 of which she would need just to walk there.

After practically sprinting out of the hotel café and somehow not breaking her neck on her way out, she burst through the glass hotel doors only to see none other than Christian turning to look in her direction just as he was about to slip into the back of a limo.

 _Of course_ he would be here; her hair was a mess, she had no makeup on, and she hadn't even brushed her teeth, however she was still wearing the same Dolce dress she had worn last night, and the Louboutin heels.

"Miss Steele. Can I offer you a ride somewhere?" he said politely, his lips twitching in amusement.

If she wasn't pressed for time as she was, she would have declined due to utter embarrassment, but unfortunately, she wasn't about to risk losing her part-time job over it.

"Uh…sure. Thanks." She said clearing her throat awkwardly, and running her hand through her hair for all the good it did.

As she slid into the seat beside him, she felt her face grow hot. She looked like a hot mess, and of course, he looked utterly perfect.

"Where to?"He asked giving her a small smirk.

"My flat is just over on Langley. Number twenty." She answered, seeing the driver nod and pull away from the curb in the direction of her flat.

"Thank you…I apologize, I hadn't intended to stay the night, and well…Now I've got to get to work" she trailed off, biting her lip.

"Stop doing that." He said suddenly, causing her to look up at him in confusion.

"You have no idea what that does to me…I want to bite that lip." He said, causing her breath to hitch.

"I think I'd like that." She whispered, leaning towards him unconsciously.

He smirked "Have dinner with me tonight."

"Alright." She agreed instantly, because what sort of moron would turn down dinner with Christian Grey?

"Good. I'll have Taylor pick you up from work."

"NO!" she shrieked, imagining how much worse she would look after her shift at Starbucks than she looked right now.

His eyes widened in surprise at her protest.

"I mean…no, that's alright, I'd prefer to swing by my flat and change first, if you don't mind." She added sheepishly.

"Of course" he chuckled, "Taylor can pick you up at your place then, say seven o'clock?"

Ana nodded, giving him a shy smile, noticing that the car was pulling to a stop in front of her flat.

"Well, this is me." She said out of habit, and he chuckled, recalling her saying those exact words just before she had stepped out of the elevator and promptly tripped.

"Do you need a hand this time?" he joked

Ana looked down at her slinky dress and heels; though she was pretty certain she wouldn't fall on her face, she could give no guarantees that she wouldn't accidentally flash her underwear to innocent bystanders who happened to be waiting for the bus.

"I think I've got it." She laughed, doing her best to shimmy towards the edge of the seat before swinging her legs out.

Once she was standing without incident, she turned back towards the car as the window rolled down.

"Until tonight, Anastasia." He said in a way that made her heart melt.

Blushing once more, she nodded shyly as the limo pulled away from the curb, and she turned and headed up the stairs to her flat.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: Here's the next chapter! I may have cackled a bit while writing it...I never thought I would enjoy writing Ana as much as I have! I am so glad you all are enjoying this! I know this chapter is kinda a cliffie, but, I'm already working on the next chapter! xo**

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"So how was the party?" Kate asked over the phone as she popped a grape in her mouth.

"It was…interesting. Turns out I wasn't gate crashing after all. Random House was bought by Grey Enterprises… _that_ was what the party was for." Ana said as she pulled copious amounts of bobby pins from her hair.

"Fuck…let me guess, you weren't really _supposed_ to be there, then, were you?" Kate asked

"Nope. And my fucking Boss was there." Ana said as she unzipped the slinky red dress, and kicked off her heels.

"Do you think she _knew_? I mean…what the actual fuck?" Kate asked, sounding pissed on her behalf.

"No, I never told Mia which publishing house I had worked for; honestly, I don't even think it had crossed her mind. She felt really bad about the whole thing, actually." Ana explained.

"I bet. What did your boss say? Are you going to get in trouble?" Kate asked

Ana sighed, "That's the really fucked up part; he sort of propositioned me. Basically, he told me to just say that I was his date if anyone asked, and then tried to get all Mister McFeely on me."

"Eww. That's a sexual harassment claim if I ever heard it. No way you'll get into trouble if he pulled shit like _that_. So what did you do?" Kate replied.

"I pretended I was sick, and went back to my room at the hotel, only…" Ana began but then stopped, wondering if she should say anything about Christian. On the one hand, she wanted to shout it from the rooftops, but on the other, she wanted to keep it to herself so that she could continue to pretend that the most eligible bachelor in probably the _world_ was interested in her.

"Only what?" Kate prompted.

"Umm…"

"Ana? What are you _not_ telling me?" Kate asked, her spidey senses telling her there was a lot more to the story here.

"Nothing really, just…Christian kissed me in the elevator." She admitted, covering her face with her hand even though no one was there to see her blush.

"What?! You kissed _Christian Grey_?! When…how? Details! I need details!" Kate shouted into the phone.

"Hold on, I'm going to put you on speaker while I shower – I have to be out the door in ten minutes."

"Fine, fine, just spill Goddammit!" Kate laughed.

Ana set her cell phone down on the sink making sure she could still hear Kate before she hopped in the shower.

"It just happened…we met before the party in the elevator out of sheer coincidence, and of course, _since it's me_ , I tripped trying to step out of the elevator. He caught me, and there was just something…God, he's so intense, Kate!" Ana gushed as she lathered her hair with her new swanky shampoo she bought from Alejandro the anal-bleacher.

"And that's when he kissed you?" Kate asked.

"No! No, he was perfectly polite. Anyway, I go to my room, and only a few minutes later, there's a knock on the door; it's one of the hotel staff holding a large vase of roses. He sent me roses! I had only just met him, and _bam_ , roses are being delivered to my door." Ana said

"Wow, you must've made quite the impression. Tell me you weren't wearing that ugly navy blue skirt."

Ana laughed, "No, I was wearing that red D&G dress Mia talked me into. Anyway, so I go to the party, and he keeps looking at me. Next thing I know, my boss shows up and gets all handsy with me. Christian comes over to see if there's a problem, and I think he really thought I was there with Jack…he seemed sort of…"

"Cock-blocked?" Kate offered chuckling.

"Maybe…Well, after he walked away, I made my excuses to jack and headed back to the elevators. As soon as I stepped inside, Christian caught the doors just before they closed, and he gave me this look like he wanted to eat me alive."

" _Hot_. Continue."

"So I'm doing the lip biting thing I always do that annoys the hell out of you, and next thing I know, he's got me up against the elevator wall, with his tongue in my mouth. Kate, I know I'm not the most experienced person…"

"Try _no_ experience…" Kate chuckled.

"But I felt that kiss all the way down in my _vagina_. Holy shit, can that man kiss." Ana said dreamily.

"Wow, you've got it bad. So did you finally cash in your V-card?" Kate asked.

"NO! I only just met him, Kate!" Ana admonished her for even thinking it.

Kate laughed, "You have more restraint than I, just sayin. I would have climbed that like a tree."

"You 've been watching Bridesmaids again, haven't you." Ana said laughing as she finished rinsing off and turned off the water.

"Maybe. So is Prince Charming planning to see you again?" Kate asked.

"Yes, actually, I'm having dinner with him tonight." Ana admitted blushing again.

"You want my advice?" Kate asked, her tone serious.

"Yes, absolutely." Ana answered gratefully.

"Buy a shitload of condoms, and ride him like his name is Seabiscuit."

"Kate!" Ana shrieked.

"Hey, you asked. Seriously though, fuck him like his life depended on it."

"Goodbye, Kate!" Ana chuckled.

"Triple Crown, Baby!" she heard Kate shout into the phone just before she hit end.

 _Oh God. Would he be expecting sex on the first date?!_

Ana thought about it and groaned; of course he would be, he was a guy. A guy that could have any woman he wanted.

She dressed quickly in her khakis and a navy blue top, and grabbed her freshly laundered apron from the back of her door, before stepping out of her flat on her way to Starbucks.

oOo0oOo

As soon as the clock chimed five, Ana was heading out of the door, rushing back to her flat to get ready. Thankfully, she had close to two hours to get ready before Taylor, whoever that was, would be there to pick her up.

After yet another shower, she rifled through her underwear drawer looking for the sexiest panties she owned. She held them up and stifled a groan; why, oh why, hadn't she thought to buy panties when she was out shopping with Mia? She held up what could only be described as granny panties and cringed. They were plain cotton, not some exotic silk, and they were high wasted. Hanes. She was going to have to wear _Hanes Her Way_ on her first date with Christian Grey. For a moment, the thought of going commando crossed her mind, until she remembered that she had actually started her period just that morning.

 _Fantastic_.

Not only was she stuck with horrid panties, she would have to worry about tampons all night to.

After dressing in one of the outfits Mia had picked out that she actually _liked_ , a pair of dark skinny jeans with a cream knit sweater, she slipped on her riding boots. She pulled her hair into a loose braid, and applied just a bit of mascara and some sheer lip gloss.

At precisely seven sharp, her door buzzed, alerting her to Taylor's arrival. She grabbed her jacket and a small wristlet and headed downstairs.

oOo0oOo

"Miss Steele?"

She recognized the man with the ear piece from the party.

"Yes, are you Taylor?" she asked not sure whether Taylor was the man's first or last name; she hoped she wasn't being rude.

"Yes, Ma'am." He said politely with a small hint of a southern accent.

Ana blushed. It always made her feel old being called 'Ma'am', though he was only trying to be polite.

He opened the car door for her, and she slipped into the backseat of the Black Audi SUV

"Where are we going?" she leaned forward to ask once he had slipped into the driver's seat.

"To dinner, Miss Steele." Taylor answered cryptically, as he pulled away from the curb, with a small smile on his face.

A few minutes later the Audi pulled up in front of a fancy French Restaurant, Clos Maggiore, and he slipped out once again to open Ana's door for her.

"Mister Grey is awaiting you inside." He said with a smile as he helped her out of the car.

Ana couldn't help but smile as she slid out of the car and made her way nervously into the restaurant.

"Anastasia"

She heard Christian's voice from behind her as she felt his hands slide up her arms to her shoulders so that he could remove her jacket.

Ana looked around the room in awe; inside the dining room, there was a canopy of branches over the entire ceilingthat were covered in white flowers, as well as elegant fireplaces on both sides of the room. The strange thing was that the dining room was completely _empty_.

"Is it normally this quiet here on a Saturday night?" Ana asked curiously.

"I didn't wish for us to be disturbed." Christian admitted as the corner of his lips lifted in the ghost of a smile.

 _Oh my god…he rented the whole place!_

"Oh…cool." Ana said awkwardly, and blushed at how stupid that sounded.

When his hand fell on the small of her back as he led her to a table set for two in the center of the room, she felt a jolt of electricity tingle along her spine that practically made her jump.

As she glanced up shyly at him, his jaw was tense, and she was sure he had felt it too.

As soon as they were seated, a waiter came over with a bottle of wine and filled both their glasses as Christian continued to gaze at her as if she were a puzzle he was intent on solving.

"So, Anastasia, tell me, how long have you been working at Random House?" Christian asked as he picked up his wine and swirled it around his glass.

 _What was this, a job interview?_

"Oh…not long actually. I'm an intern. I am…or _was_ …Jack Hyde's assistant editor. This was only my first week." Ana said blushing, not sure if she would still have a job come Monday.

"Some week" Christian said with a knowing grin, thinking of the merger.

"Yes, it was." Ana chuckled, "I almost turned it down, you know."

Christian furrowed his brow and tilted his head in curiosity, "Why? Random House is one on the biggest publishing houses in the world."

Ana bit her bottom lip out of habit, when she noticed his eyes darken and she quickly released it.

"Well, I was a bit intimidated. I've lived in Seattle all my life, and well this is an entirely different _continent_. It was a pretty big decision." Ana said as she sipped her wine.

Christian nodded and added, "Fear of the unknown."

"I suppose it was; though between my insatiable curiosity and my domineering roommate, Kate, I accepted the position and before I knew it, I was arriving at Heathrow."

The corner of Christian's lips curved up into a smirk, at her words.

"Some people say _'curiosity killed the cat'_ ; though personally, I think a little curiosity is a _good_ thing."

Ana raised her glass to his with a small smile, "I agree. Here's to being curious."

A moment later, their dinner arrived, as Christian had pre-ordered it. Filet Mignon with a mushroom red wine reduction, and roasted potatoes.

"So, Christian, tell me about yourself. What do you like to do for fun?" Ana asked as she cut into her steak.

"I have quite a few… _hobbies_." He said with a smirk as he watched here carefully.

"Such as?" she prodded.

"Curious?" he challenged raising an eyebrow at her, knowing she would say yes.

Ana bit her lip again and blushed, "Very."

His nostrils flared as he exhaled sharply, and signaled the waiter for the bill.

"Let's get out of here." He said as he stood and held out his hand to her.

She stared at it for a moment, then finished her wine in one large gulp before she stood and placed her hand in his.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: Here's chapter 5! I don't want to spoil anything, so I'll leave my AN at the end! Please review! xxoo**

 **Added note: A few of you already left reviews on this chapter, so I wanted to address something here, just to clear things up: Christian IS creepy. If any normal guy pulled some of the shenanigans he does in the actual book/movie, they'd probably be slapped with a restraining order or punched in the dick. That being said, Ana is an adult and can make her own choices...she's not a helpless victim. Also, i'll add in case it wasn't already super obvious, this is a comedy, and it's intent is to sorta poke fun at the book/movie. Enjoy at your own risk!**

* * *

Ana looked up at Christian as he guided her from the restaurant in confusion. They had barely touched their dinner, and now he was whisking her off to god knows where.

 _What if he was a serial killer of something? He could have at least let her finish her steak…_

"Where are we going, Christian?" she asked, unsure if he would tell her.

"Shopping." He said with a smirk as he guided her towards the black Audi SUV.

"Shopping?" she asked, as she mentally tried to connect the dots, but coming up empty handed, "For what possible reason?"

 _Did he hate her outfit or something?_

His lips twitched as he glanced over at her, "Where I am taking you, there is a certain…dress code." He said cryptically as he reached toward her playfully and touched her braid.

 _Oh_. Maybe she was under dressed for his taste…she had been wearing a designer dress when they had first met.

She glanced out the window watching the scenery pass by as Christian pulled out his phone and made a quick call to someone.

As the Audi pulled into a parking garage nestled behind some high end shops, she was still no closer to understanding what exactly they were doing.

"Anastasia, before we go inside, I'll need for you to sign this non-disclosure agreement. I'm afraid my lawyer insists on it."

"Why?" she asked in confusion as she took the document he handed her along with a pen.

"It basically just states that you won't discuss anything that happens between us with anyone. With all those gossip rags looking to print anything that will sell a magazine these days, I'm sure you understand why this is necessary."

She _did_ understand. Just last month she recalled seeing a picture of him on the cover of _In Touch Weekly_ , where they proclaimed that he was gay. She relaxed slightly, picking up the pen and signed her name with a flourish.

"There. Now will you tell me what we're doing here?" she said as she bit back a grin.

"I told you; we're shopping." He said giving her a mischievous grin as he stepped out of the car and came around to open her door for her, offering his hand. She raised an eyebrow at him questioningly, but slipped her hand into his and stepped out of the car. The same jolt that had passed through her at the restaurant was there again, making her hyper aware of his closeness. He led her to an unmarked door that looked like it could have been an employee entrance, or great place to hide a body, and lifted his hand to the buzzer.

Maybe he _was_ planning to kill her…chop her up and leave her in some weird abandoned maintenance closet…

The door swung open revealing a short Asian woman with slicked back black hair and red lipstick, wearing what looked like a skin tight latex cat-suit.

 _What in the seven hells?_

"Madame Yao" Christian greeted, giving a small bow.

Anastasia watched curiously, wondering if she should also bow, but decided against it and instead opted for a small polite if not awkward smile.

"Mister Grey. Please, come in." she said as she held the door open for them to pass through.

The hall was dimly lit, and she allowed Christian to lead her inside, since he seemed to know where he was going. Her curiosity was becoming unbearable when she finally blurted out, "What exactly are we shopping…for…" when the words died in her throat.

She wasn't sure what she had been expecting, but it hadn't been this. Lining the walls of this, albeit elegantly decorated boutique, were corsets, leather collars, and other items of debauchery that she couldn't even begin to imagine what they were used for.

" _What_?…" she began to say as she looked around in fascinated horror.

"I'm taking you to a club, Anastasia, one that I hope you'll enjoy… _with me_."

"What the _hell_ kind of a club, Christian? Is that a _dog_ collar?!" she asked incredulously as she moved over to inspect the spiked leather collars adorning the wall.

Christian glanced over at the short Asian woman and said quietly, "Would you give us a moment?"

The woman, Madame Yao, nodded, and stepped out of the room, leaving the two of them alone.

"Anastasia, I imagine you must have questions." Christian said as he approached her slowly.

"Questions? Christian, what the _hell_ is this place? What are we _doing_ here?" she blurted.

"This boutique caters to those of us with… _particular_ tastes. As for what we're doing here, I thought that much would be obvious." Christian said watching her carefully as she continued to take in her surroundings.

"Curious?" he asked as he watched her run her finders along an embellished leather corset.

Ana blushed a deep shade of crimson, and bit down on her bottom lip as she nodded, "Very."

The smile that spread across Christian's face then was one of victory, "Good."

A moment later Madame Yao stepped back into the room, and she saw Christian walk over to speak with her in low tones, pointing out a few items as she whispered, "Excellent choice, Mister Grey."

She tried not to fidget as the petite woman approached her, turning her this way and that as she assessed her measurements.

"Come, Miss Steele." She said as she led her to a tastefully decorated fitting room that had mirrors on three sides with a raised dais in the center. It reminded her of the ones you see at a Wedding boutique, only the curtains were blood red, and the lighting was muted. Her only comfort was that at least Christian wasn't going to be _watching_ her undress. _She hoped_.

Madame Yao returned a moment later with the items Christian had requested, and she had to give herself a mental pep talk.

 _You can do this, Steele, think of it as dressing up for Halloween; a really_ slutty _Halloween._

"Should I just…" she began to ask when Madame Yao suddenly yanked her cream knit top over her head and spun her around, next yanking down her jeans.

 _Whoa! Slow down cat woman, we just met!_

Ana made a half-hearted attempt to cover her breasts as the women slipped her bra off without so much as a 'by your leave', when she looked over her shoulder to see why Madame Yao had suddenly stopped at her underpants.

Madame Yao was staring at her underpants looking as if she had just sucked on a lemon.

"Hanes her way." Ana explained with a nervous chuckle.

"More like Hanes _no way_." Madame Yao said with a shake of her head as if she had somehow been personally offended by Ana's choice of undergarments.

"Hold onto something." Madame Yao said before she slipped on the corset and pulled hard on the laces, almost knocking Ana off her feet. She quickly grabbed hold of the marble column near to where she had been standing, and grunted rather ungracefully as the corset was pulled so tight she could barely suck in a breath.

"Um…I think it's a bit too tight." Ana managed to say as she attempted to look over her shoulder at her torturer.

"Then it's just right." Madame Yao said with a knowing smirk before she once again cringed at Ana's underwear.

"Take those off, and put this on." She snapped handing Ana an extremely short black leather skirt, if it could even be classified as a skirt; it wasn't even a mini-skirt, it was a _micro-_ skirt.

Ana shimmied her way into the skirt, and turned to Madame Yao expectantly waiting for some sort of underwear, but none were forthcoming.

"Um…I can't go commando in this…everyone will see my…" Ana trailed off gesturing with her hand towards her crotch, as if she were looking for the right word.

"Pussy?" Madame Yao said unabashedly, as she raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at Ana.

"Tampon string." Ana corrected, flushing crimson once again.

Madame Yao tilted her head as she looked at Ana, and tried to unsuccessfully bite back a smirk.

"Mister Grey hasn't requested that any undergarments be provided."

"Well it's not as if I announced to him that I was on my period, now is it!" Ana cried indignantly. There was _no way in hell_ she was walking out of here with her tampon string blowing in the breeze.

Madame Yao sighed, and seemed to take pity on her, "I think I have something that will work."

Ana watched as the petite woman strode away on impossibly high stilettos, and thought to herself that she and Mia would get along famously. She returned a moment later and handed Ana something small and round wrapped in plastic.

"What's this?" Ana asked turning it this way and that trying to figure out what it was.

"It's a menstrual cup. Problem solved." Madame Yao said as she turned Ana back around and slipped the leather collar around her neck.

"How do I?" Ana asked uncertainly and tried to turn back towards Madame Yao.

"You take out the tampon and put this in instead. No string. No mess." Madame Yao said shaking her head.

"But how do you get it _out_?" Ana asked, aware of how naive the question probably sounded.

Madame Yao raised her eyebrow at Ana in disbelief, "Google it."

Not wanting to anger the petite woman any further, she nodded and wisely kept her mouth shut.

After slipping on a pair of black heels that were just as horrid to walk in as the Louboutin's, she made her way to the adjoining bathroom to deal with her tampon situation.

She easily found the string of her tampon and plucked it out, wrapping it politely in tissue before tossing it in the trash, and opened the small package that Madame Yao had given her. It looked similar to a diaphragm, only it had a cup to collect the blood so that it wouldn't leak. After a few awkward moments of shoving a foreign object into her vagina sans applicator, she felt confident that she had it in properly, and washed her hands.

As she stepped out of the restroom, she heard Christian's voice.

"You look lovely, Anastasia."

She whirled around quickly to face him, not having expected that he would be in the fitting room, and blushed.

 _Had he heard her grunting in frustration in the bathroom?_

"Is everything…alright?" he asked raising an eyebrow in concern.

 _Yep, he definitely heard._

Ana nodded quickly, giving him a nervous smile, "Fine, though I feel a bit exposed…"

Christian smirked and tossed her a pair of black silk panties, "I thought you might."

Was he carrying panties around in his pocket now? She didn't recall seeing anything like this in Madame Yao's boutique.

"I had Taylor pick them up." He explained answering her un-asked question.

 _Oh God, his_ driver _bought her panties? She'd never be able to look that man in the eye ever again._

"Your driver bought me panties? She said raising her eyebrow in disbelief.

Christian chuckled, "Truthfully, Taylor is much more than just my driver."

 _Oh fuck, maybe In Touch Weekly had it right after all…_

"He's is my personal security guard, though really, he's more like a personal assistant; he does anything I ask him to."

"I see. And is buying panties for your girlfriends part of his job description?" Ana asked jokingly.

"I don't have girlfriends, Anastasia." He answered, not bothering to comment on the fact that his driver/security guard/personal assistant gets paid to buy panties.

"Then what _is_ this, Christian?" she asked gesturing between them.

Rather than answer her, he took a step towards her and cupped her cheek, staring into her eyes with a look that made her knees weak.

"My tastes are very… _singular_. This is what I know, Anastasia." He said searching her eyes for acceptance.

"I'm not going to just _sleep_ with you, Christian." Ana said meeting his gaze defiantly

He smirked brushing his lips against hers, "Who said anything about sleep?"

His lips moved over hers in a demanding kiss that instantly made her wet.

 _Crap, I hope I put that cup in right…_

Christian pulled back from her, skimming his nose along her cheek, "Still curious?"

 _Does a bear shit in the woods?!_

"Yes." She answered breathily, leaning into him for another kiss.

"That's my girl."

* * *

 **AN: Well, the cat's out of the bag! She now knows he's into some pretty kinky shit, but they still haven't gotten to the club yet...LOL...Anyway, I hope you like it so far, I was laughing quite a bit writing this chapter, and I hope you all did too! next chapter will be the club...will it be too much for innocent Ana? You'll have to read and find out!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: I wanted to address this again, because some of you may not have seen my added AN on the last chapter. I am honestly surprised that some of you were bothered by the fact that Christian seemed a bit creepy in the last chapter. Did none of you find him or the things he did creepy at all in the _actual_ book or movie? Because despite the fact that he's hot, and Ana was desperately attracted to him as well as a bit naive, his characterization _WAS_ creepy. He may have been suave about certain things at times, but make no mistake, his behavior most of the time, was really not OK by most people's standards.**

 **Let's count the ways in which Christian IS creepy in Canon, shall we?**

 ***He has a FILE on Ana**

 ***He uses said file to stalk her at Clayton's, where he buys shit he hopes to use on her later in his playroom, without her knowledge.**

 ***He tracks her whereabouts with from her cell phone.**

 ***He has his _driver_ buy her clothes and undergarments after he took her back to his hotel when she was drunk, rather than taking her home.**

 ***He tells her he won't touch her until he has her written consent (cuz that's not weird, or anything!)**

 ***He makes her sign the NDA as soon as she gets to his house, then proceeds to tell her straight up that he only wants a particular sort of relationship.**

 ***He takes her right into his playroom on their first "date"**

 ***He assumes that since she's a virgin, it's his responsibility to rid her of it…doesn't ask, just "rectifies the situation"**

 ***Tells her after he sleeps with her (again, only after the first date, and she still barely knows him) that he expects her to move in part time and sleep in her own room.**

 **Honestly, I could go on and on…this is only in the first half of the first book. The point I am trying to make, is that Christian _IS_ Fifty shades of fucked up. He's not the romantic hero that Ana thinks he is (or wants him to be) at least initially. In _this_ fic, which  IS a comedy, he's going to let his freak flag fly, because he's used to getting what he wants, when he wants it. Ana, though still desperately attracted to him, and also still a bit naïve, will not simply let him push her into anything she doesn't want to do. She's not a helpless Victim…she makes her own choices. She will stand her ground when she feels she needs to, and she will let him know it. You have to remember here, that Ana is curious by nature, and she is experiencing something new for the first time with a guy she really is attracted to…believe me, she'll let him know if she's not into trying something, or if it's too much. For those that commented that Christian was as creepy as Jack, well, _he kind of is_. The only difference is that Jack doesn't understand the word "no" and Christian does, and he is ultimately more smooth in his approach. That doesn't mean he won't be honest about what he's looking for, at least initially…after all, that's exactly what he does in the books. I believe there is even a part where Ana says something to the effect, 'So If I don't want to do this, there'll be nothing at all between us?' (I'm paraphrasing here).**

 **Sorry for the long rant, but some of the reviews kind of made it seem like *I* did this to his character, and *I* made him creepy. I'm pretty certain E.L. James gets full credit for that, not me. I just shined a light on it a little more directly. Now, if you're still reading this, here is chapter 6…try not to take it so seriously…this is a crackfic after all, _not_ a drama.**

* * *

"I can't believe I'm doing this, I look ridiculous." Ana chuckled under her breath as she slid into the backseat of the Audi.

"You look beautiful, Anastasia; please trust me." He said lifting her hand to his lips, and dropping a feather soft kiss on her knuckles.

"Where exactly are we going?" She asked, mesmerized by his hands as he removed his tie and rolled up the sleeves of his undoubtedly expensive dress shirt.

The corner of his lips curved up into a sexy grin, "Torture Garden."

Her mouth dropped open, and she stared at him, but before she could verbalize her thoughts, he held up his hand.

"Relax, Anastasia, it's just a club."

"A club for kinky fuckery, you mean." Ana quipped, raising her eyebrow at him, daring him to deny it.

"Kinky fuckery?" He repeated, chuckling at her colorful vocabulary.

"Yes, you know, like toe sucking, and weird tickling and stuff…?" she explained.

"Weird tickling…?" He said in amusement, trying not to laugh.

Ana rolled her eyes, "You know, with strange objects like a rubber chicken…or something equally shady."

"Wherever did you get an idea like that?" he asked full on laughing now.

"Well I'm right, aren't, I?" she asked, waiting for him to stop laughing at her.

"No, Anastasia," Christian said taking a breath as he finally stopped laughing, "Although some people may have certain fetishes like _being tickled with a rubber chicken_ , that's not what BDSM is about." He said as the car pulled into another parking garage. He got out of the car, and walked over to her side to help her step out.

"Oh." She said blushing in embarrassment as she took his hand, once again feeling a bit self-conscious at how she was dressed.

"Don't fidget. You're beautiful, Anastasia."

He led her over to what looked like a service elevator, and pushed the button simply stenciled with the letters "TG", and then gave her a look as if he wanted to devour her the moment the doors slid shut.

"What is it about elevators?" she said meeting his hungry gaze with one of her own.

The door slid open before either of them could make a move, to reveal an Asian inspired posh looking bar that was very dimly lit. The first thing Ana noticed, was that she was far from the only woman there wearing a corset. In fact, compared to the woman wearing only what looked to be leather hot pants and electrical tape on her nipples, she looked downright _matronly_. He led her over to a private booth in what looked like a VIP area, and slid in across from him.

"To answer your question, Anastasia, a BDSM relationship is about pleasure, and control. Learning your own limits; what you like, what you don't, and having absolute trust in your partner."

Ana bit her lip as she gazed up at him though her lashes, "But you said you didn't do relationships."

"I said I didn't do the _girlfriend_ thing; there's a difference." He said watching her carefully as he poured her a glass of red wine that had already been brought over to their table as soon as they sat down.

"What does that even mean? You're so confusing, Christian." Ana said shaking her head in frustration, "Why am I here?"

"I don't have girlfriends, I have _submissives_ , Anastasia. I told you, it's the only relationship I know how to have."

His words hit her like a bucket of ice water. She was reminded just how out of her depth she was as she gazed at the beautiful man that sat across from her. Here she was, _a virgin_ , who never had so much as had a single boyfriend before now, and he was admitting that he wanted to _dominate_ her.

She let her gaze fall on a couple over by the bar. The man was standing talking to the bartender casually, and in his hand was a chain…no a _leash_ that was connected to the collar of a petite blond woman who stood beside him obediently, staring blankly at his feet.

 _Is that what Christian wanted?_

"Say something, please." He said after a beat of silence, raking his hand through his dark curls.

"I'm sort of still trying to process this. It's a lot to take in." she answered honestly as she sipped her wine and studied him over the rim of her wineglass.

"Would we still go out and do things like a regular couple, or?" she asked still trying to understand the dynamic that he was proposing.

"No…at least that's not how I preferred to do things in any of my previous relationships. You would stay with me on the weekends, in your own room of course, and I'd take you to my playroom as I see fit. If you please me, I'll reward you." he answered, watching her carefully.

"And if I displease you? What would happen?" she asked feeling a sinking feeling in her stomach.

"I'd punish you." He answered simply, as if it was obvious.

"Punish me…how?" She asked, dreading what he would say.

"That depends on the offense. Punishments could be anything from a few spankings to something a bit more intense." He answered, taking another sip of his wine.

She swallowed thickly, imagining all manner of medieval torture devices. _Whips were usually involved in this sort of thing, weren't they?_

"So what would I possibly get out of all this? Why should I agree?" she asked in challenge.

"You'd get me. I'd be completely devoted to you, and _only you_ , Anastasia." He answered meeting her eyes with his piercing gaze.

She looked down at her hands as they traced the stem of her wineglass. This "date" had not at all gone how she imagined it would; she had imagined they'd have dinner, and that they'd fall in love over dessert, and that maybe he'd kiss her again like he had in the elevator. She never in a million years would have guessed that his hobbies included torturing women on the weekends with sex toys, and that she'd be sitting across from him in some weird sex club _actually_ considering it. _What would Kate say?_ Oh right, she'd signed that NDA.

"Anastasia?" he prompted, waiting for her answer.

"Take me home, Christian."

 **ooOo0oOoo**

The ride back to her flat was silent as she tried to look anywhere but at him, though she could feel his gaze on her. As the Audi pulled up to the curb in front of her flat, she didn't immediately hop out. She knew the moment she opened the door, she'd be stepping out of his life forever.

"I'm sorry if I've upset you, it wasn't my intention. I truly hoped you would say yes." He said in a resigned tone that broke her heart into a million pieces. _It was just so unfair_ …

"Christian, I just...I need _more_. How can I give up experiencing something I've never even _had_?" she said in frustration.

His brows furrowed at that, "What do you mean, ' _something you've never had'_?"

She laughed bitterly, "I've never dated _anyone_ , Christian, I wasn't even asked to _prom_ , and you want me to just-"

His lips were on hers suddenly, kissing her with the same intensity they had experienced in the elevator; hungry and desperate. She felt her resolve crumbling, wondering if even a moment in his arms like this would be worth the potential heartache.

He broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against hers, "Jesus Ana, I took you to that _club_ …why didn't you tell me?"

She chuckled at the absurdity of it all, "It didn't seem like a good time…"

"What must you think of me? Christ, Ana…" he said shaking his head in frustration.

"Well, considering you dispelled the rubber chicken theory, my opinion of you is much higher than it otherwise could have been." She chuckled trying to lighten the mood.

Christian laughed, despite his best effort not to and looked at her appreciatively, "What are you doing to me, Miss Steele?"

Ana bit back a smile, feeling a bit of hope flare in her chest, "Goodnight, Christian, it's been an… _enlightening_ evening." She said as she opened the door and stepped out of the Audi with her dignity still mostly intact.

"Goodnight, Anastasia." He said with a grin as he watched her make her way into the building.

* * *

 **AN: And there you have it. No weak Ana giving into to something she doesn't want to do/isn't ready for. I wanted this scene to kind of echo the part in the book where he tells her about how he'd like their arrangement to be with her having her own bedroom at Escala, and the previous 15 women, and she tells him she'd like to go home. And unlike the book, she leaves her first date with him with her V card intact.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: I know it's been a while, but my muse it back! I hope you all are still reading this! Thank you for all the favorites and follows! xo**

* * *

Anna snorted and broke into a fit of giggles once again as she passed by the floor length mirror in her small flat. Thank goodness that no one aside from a few people she'd likely never see again in the kink club, Christian, and Taylor had seen her wearing _that_. She studied her reflection in the mirror, and shook her head. The girl staring back at her donned in a black leather corset and tiny leather skirt was not _her_. The thought of being submissive, being treated no better than somebody's _pet_ , turned her stomach. _Was that the type of girl Christian truly wanted?_ If it was, she knew that she would never be able to give him that.

Her phone began to buzz, with an incoming text from Kate:

 _ **I hope you're totally having sex right now, and not looking at this message…but you better call me later with details! – K**_

Ana sighed. She couldn't tell Kate anything about Christian's penchant for Kinky fuckery due to the NDA, but she supposed she could leave out the more salacious details, and tell Kate that things hadn't worked out; she would be expecting an update on how the date went after all.

Kate picked up on the first ring, almost breathless with anticipation.

"It's early…why are you calling me this early?" Kate asked, the sound of disappointment apparent in her tone.

"Because I asked him to bring me home, Kate." Ana exhaled in what sounded like an exaggerated sigh, though really, it was because she was winded form trying to shimmy her way out of the tiny leather skirt.

"Why? What happened? Did he _do_ something? Do I need to fly to England and give someone a beat down?" Kate asked anxiously, her voice growing more concerned by the moment.

"No, no…We just…wanted two very different things, I suppose." Ana explained, trying to be as vague as possible.

"He was just looking for sex, you mean." Kate deadpanned.

"Something like that" Ana sighed, though it was mostly from finally extricating herself from the damned corset.

"Ana, I wish I had your discipline; Oh wait, no I don't, because I'd be fucking Christian Grey right now instead of talking to you…" Kate snorted, "I'm kidding. But seriously, your will power is _awe-inspiring_. Good for you for sticking to your guns…or in this case, your _hymen_."

"Kate!" Anna snorted, "Believe me, it's not like I wasn't tempted, he's gorgeous; but I just kind of want the fairytale, you know?"

"I know. How could you not when you spend your life immersed in books like Pride and Prejudice? You're looking for your own Mr. Darcy."

"Well, I should go, I have to be at work in the morning; that is if I still have a _job_ at Random House." Ana sighed.

"I'm sure everything will work out; and if your boss, Mister McFeely, tries _anything_ like that again, I want you to go straight to HR, you hear me?"

"Aye, aye, captain, message received. Good night!" Ana said chuckling at Kate's new nickname for her flaming douche of a boss.

She plugged in her phone to charge before slipping into a pair of black leggings and a loose fitting tank top, and suddenly remembered the weird menstrual cup that Madame Yao had given her; how the hell was she supposed to get it out?

She grabbed her phone again, and googled "removing a menstrual cup" and grimaced at the instructions that came up in her search results:

 _ **Bear down. Sometimes a menstrual cup will move up the vaginal canal…**_

 _ **Squat. If you still cannot reach the cup, squat on the floor or lift one leg up and rest your foot on the toilet seat or edge of the bath…**_

 _What the actual fuck._

Whoever had invented this thing, had clearly not thought this through.

She took a deep breath and headed into the bathroom, making a quick sign of the cross in a desperate plea to anyone who might be listening, for it to come out easily.

Twenty minutes later, she emerged from the bathroom sweaty, but triumphant, after having washed her hands at least five times. Tampons were bad enough, but at least they came with an applicator and a string; _what the hell had these people been thinking?!_

Feeling more like herself with her large overnight maxi with wings, she crawled into bed, and hoped that tomorrow would be a better day.

 **ooOo0oOoo**

When she arrived at Random House, her stomach roiled with anxiety not only at the thought of facing Jack, but what if Christian was there? He did just buy the company after all…

Taking a deep breath, she stepped through the glass doors, and made her way up to the seventh floor, where Jack's office was. When she stepped out of the elevator and rounded the corner, she was surprised to find Elizabeth, the HR director shuffling through stacks of paper on Jack's desk, with Jack nowhere in sight.

"Oh, Ana. Thank God. You're familiar with the manuscripts Jack was working on, aren't you?"

Ana made to answer, but Liz just shook her head as if it was a stupid question, and continued, "Of course you are, you were his assistant."

Ana couldn't help notice her use of the term 'were'. _Was she fired?_

"Um…has something happened?" Ana asked timidly, not sure what was going on.

"Oh…right…you don't know. Jack submitted his resignation early this morning, effective immediately. There is a senior editor's meeting in…" Elizabeth's eyes darted to the clock on the opposite wall, "Ten minutes. Do you think you could fill in? Temporarily, I mean, until we find a suitable replacement?" She asked, giving Ana a hopeful look.

To say that Ana was gob smacked was an understatement. Jack had resigned? He hadn't seemed like he was considering his resignation two days ago…

"Of course, I'd be happy to." Ana answered, nodding at Elizabeth, who sighed with relief.

"Wonderful! The meeting is in conference room A, Thanks again!" she said as she rushed from the office, leaving Ana standing there dumbfounded.

Senior Editor.

At Random House.

 _Holy fucking shit._

She set down her bag and let out a small squee of excitement, before clearing her throat and looking around nervously to make sure no one witnessed her little happy dance. Even though it was only temporary, the experience would be invaluable, and it would look great on her resume. Glancing quickly at the clock, she remembered that she now had only five minutes, and quickly grabbed a notebook, pen, and her notes on the manuscripts Jack had asked her to read for him, and hurried down the hall to the conference room.

There were a few higher level employees already seated at the table, who shot her questioning looks, clearly wondering what an intern was doing at the senior editor's meeting. She gave them a small nervous smile, and was summoning the courage to introduce herself when she heard a familiar voice from behind her.

"Miss Steele, I understand you'll be filling in for Jack Hyde. Welcome aboard."

 _Christian_.

She gaped at him in surprise for a moment, before remembering that he now owned the company, and could sit in on any meeting he chose.

"I…yes, thank you…Mister Grey." She stammered trying to hide the blush that was creeping up her neck as his gaze swept over her. She felt even more self-conscious when she noticed every single person in the room, save her, sat with a shiny silver Mac book Pro opened in front of them.

She was quiet for most of the meeting, feeling extremely out of her depth, and unable to get the image out of her head of Christian sitting across from her in the kinky sex club, when his voice cut through her thoughts.

"I'd love to hear your thoughts on it, Anastasia."

 _Fuck. What had they been talking about?_

"Oh…um…actually," she began slowly, her eyes glancing quickly at the computer screen of the person sitting immediately to her left, and she saw that the most recent political manuscript she had been tasked to read was pulled up on the screen.

"I think we should go for it. I've done some research, and not only does Boyce Fox have a great manuscript here, he has a large following online. These are exactly the kind of readers we should be targeting." She said excitedly, blushing once again when she was met with blank stares from everyone at the table, save Christian. The corner of his lips were quirked up into a small smile as he nodded in approval.

"But he's never even been on the best seller's list!" One of the older senior editor's barked, "Excuse my saying so, but why should we listen to an _intern_?" he snapped.

Ana flushed in embarrassment. _Maybe she was in over her head_.

"Actually, I think Miss Steele has the right of it." Another older gentleman at the table spoke up who had been mulling over her argument, "We've been chasing the 18-25 year demographic for a while now, and I think this is how we're going to get it. It's a risk, sure, but I think it's one worth taking."

She sucked in a breath, and hope flared in her chest as she began to hear murmurs of approval around the table.

"It's settled then. Boyce Fox is in. Congratulations, Miss Steele." Christian said giving her a small smile that she couldn't help but return.

 _Was this really happening?_

A few moments later, the meeting came to a close, as everyone began to file out, and she rose slowly from her seat, trying to keep calm in the face of her excitement. Not only was she an acting Senior Editor at Random House, she just persuaded the other editors to publish a manuscript that she'd suggested. By the time she reached Jack's office, _her office_ , she could barely contain her grin. She was just about to check her messages when she heard the chime of an incoming text.

 ** _Congratulations, Anastasia. I'd like to take you to lunch, if you're free – C_**

As soon as she saw that it was from Christian, she bit back a smile and began to text him back

 ** _Thank you, lunch sounds nice. How did you get my number, anyway?_**

a moment later, another chime sounded

 ** _Oh, I have my ways, Miss Steele._**

She chuckled, texting him back,

 ** _Mia?_**

Not even a second later, he responded.

 ** _Yep._**

She snorted at his response and continued typing

 ** _I thought as much. Where should I meet you?_**

Her phone chimed again

 ** _Taylor will have the Audi out front at noon._**

She bit her lip, her smile beginning to feel like it was taking up permanent residence on her face, when she typed back quickly;

 ** _See you then ;p_**

 **ooOo0oOoo**

Her stomach was a ball of nerves as she headed down to the lobby, and out through the glass doors towards where the shiny black Audi SUV sat parked out front. As she made her way to the car, the man she recognized as Taylor stepped out from the driver's side, and made his way around the car to open the door for her. Christian was already inside, looking utterly perfect in his dark gray suit.

She smirked as she slid into her seat, remembering the last time he had asked her to dine with him as Taylor closed the door behind her.

"There's no _dress code_ for lunch, is there?" she asked teasingly, letting him know that she had found the whole thing rather humorous.

He laughed, "No, Ana, no dress code, and no rubber chickens. Just lunch."

"Sounds perfect." Ana said giving him a genuine smile as the Audi pulled away from the curb.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Fifty Shades Trilogy, I am just having a bit of fun with the characters, and making no profit.**

 **AN: Here's the next chapter! I hope you all like it! xo**

* * *

"So what are you in the mood for?" he asked innocently

 _You, naked on top of me_ , She thought to herself, as she gave him a doe-eyed look.

"Thai? Italian? Japanese?" he suggested, waiting for her to indicate her preference.

Italian was a definite _no_ , she didn't want to have garlic breath if he decided to kiss her again. Feeling like she needed to make a decision quickly, she mentioned the first thing that popped into her head.

"I know a great little pub, actually."

"A pub?" he asked questioningly, as if he'd never heard of one before.

"Yes, Christian, a _pub_. You know, burgers, beer, fish and chips?" She laughed. As wealthy as Christian was, it was entirely possible he'd never stepped foot in a pub, when he had restaurants like Clos Maggiore at his back and call. Unfortunately for her, being broke in the UK meant eating at hole-in-the-wall pubs on the regular.

He tried to suppress his smirk, and nodded, "Taylor, We'll be going to Miss Steele's pub for lunch today."

Taylor met her eyes in the rear view mirror, "Miss Steele?"

"It's on Chancery Lane; Knights Templar." She told him before giving Christian a shy smile.

A short while later, they pulled up in front of the pub, and Christian opened the door for her as she stepped inside.

"It's…"

"I know it doesn't look like much, but the food here is actually pretty good." Ana quickly said, feeling a bit self-conscious.

"I was going to say it's _refreshing_. Do you have any idea how long it's been since I've been to a place like this?" he smiled as she led him over to a small round top table and took a seat.

It didn't take long for the bartender to come over to their table, "What'll ya have?" he asked, looking pointedly at Ana.

Christian spoke up immediately, "We'll have two hamburgers cooked medium with fries, and two Stella Artois."

The bartender nodded and was about to walk away when Ana got his attention, "Actually, I'd like cheese on mine, Cheddar please, cooked rare, with a side of Mayo."

Christian looked at her in surprise, "Ana, you know you could get food poisoning from under cooked meat…"

She arched her brow in challenge, "Yes, well, I think I know how I like my _meat_ , Christian."

He bit back a smirk, "Do you now…"

She blushed and quickly changed the subject as thoughts of _Christian's_ meat popped into her head.

"So are you going to tell me the real reason why Jack Hyde resigned?"

Christian sighed, "I didn't like the way he was looking at you."

Ana gaped at him, "Christian, you can't fire someone because you don't like the way they _look_ at me."

Christian scoffed, "I didn't fire him, I merely suggested that he resign, unless he wanted to be caught up in a nasty sexual harassment lawsuit."

Ana opened her mouth to speak, but be held up his hand, "Did you know he had three assistants in the last 18 months, all of whom quit without notice? This goes far beyond just you, Ana." He said as he poured his beer into a glass.

"So you didn't have anything to do with me being made acting Senior Editor then?" she asked, a hint of skepticism still in her voice.

"No. That was all you." He answered giving her a genuine smile that made her breath catch in her throat.

When their food arrived, she was saved from having to talk as she picked up a French fry and dipped it into the mayo.

Christian wrinkled his nose as he watched her, "That's disgusting."

Ana smirked as she brought the fry to her lips and made a show of licking the mayo off of it, just to gross him out further.

It seemed to have the opposite effect though, as his eyes suddenly darkened, and his nostrils flared as he watched her.

"Unless you want me to fuck you in what is probably a dirty pub toilet, I suggest you stop doing that."

The thought of her legs wrapped around his waist as he fucked her up against the wooden stall door suddenly popped into her mind, and she pressed her thighs together under the table.

"You're not playing fair." She answered, knowing that he was able to see the change in her breathing.

"I never have." he smirked before taking a bite of his burger while keeping his eyes trained on her.

"But you're my boss…" she said biting her lip and gazing up at him from beneath her lashes.

"Technically, I'm your boss's, boss's, boss…" he answered, arching an eyebrow at her.

She let out a shaky breath and took a large gulp of her beer, hoping to wash away the image that was now playing on a loop in her brain.

"The other editors will talk. They'll think I _slept_ my way into this position." She said, wanting to make her concerns known.

"Well, since I haven't fucked you yet, it seems you have nothing to worry about." He said chuckling and taking a sip of his beer

She didn't miss the fact that he'd said ' _yet_ '.

"I'm not going to be your submissive, Christian." She said firmly, making sure she made that perfectly clear. As much as she wanted to be with him, she knew she could never compromise herself like that.

"Okay." He answered, a smirk still playing at the edge of his lips.

" _Okay?_ " she asked, feeling like she somehow missed something rather important.

"We'll take things slow. No rules, no punishments. A vanilla relationship."

"But I thought you wanted all those things?" she asked, not daring to hope that he meant what it sounded like; the feeling of butterflies suddenly swooping around in her belly made her light-headed.

"I want _you_ more."

His answer was so honest, it made her breath catch in her throat. She wanted nothing more than to climb into his lap and let him kiss her like he had in the elevator.

"What about work?" she asked, still trying to process everything he was telling her.

"Unless you plan to announce to everyone at a staff meeting that we're fucking, I don't see the problem." He chuckled.

She snorted and took a sip of her beer, "We're not fucking _yet_ , Mister Grey."

His glass clinked lightly against hers in a mock toast, "Not yet…Miss Steele, _not yet_."

 **ooOo0oOoo**

By the time they returned to Random House after lunch, she was positively _beaming_. Today had so far been the best day of her life; first, her sleaze ball of a boss, Mister McFeely, was uninvited to continue working at Random House. Then she got an unexpected promotion, albeit temporarily while she finished her internship, and then the sexiest man alive (yes, _People_ magazine actually awarded him that title) told her in no uncertain terms that he would be the one to rid her of her virginity, _after_ making her feel like the heroine in a smutty romance novel. It wasn't a Jane Austen sort of romance, but she'd settle for Johanna Lindsey in a pinch.

The rest of the day flew by quickly in a daze, and she was just getting ready to leave when someone from the IT department stopped by her office.

"I have a laptop here for Miss Steele?" He asked uncertainly, holding a silver, shiny Mac Book Pro.

"That's me" she said uncertainly, as she stepped aside so that he could set it on her desk and set it up.

After he left, she opened the email icon, and saw that there was a message waiting for her from Christian.

" _Ana,_

 _Congratulations again on your promotion. This is YOURS._

 _~Christian_ "

She tried not to read into it too much, as it was probably just a company computer, but the fact that he had clearly asked IT to get her set up with one so quickly was sweet. It would certainly help her to stay more organized as she waded through the many manuscripts that were being sent to her from the other editors to read.

By the time she reached her flat, her phone began to buzz.

"Are you still employed?" Kate asked on the other end of the line.

"Yes, but oh my god, you aren't going to believe what happened today…" she began

"Let me guess, the man-whore was there?" Kate answered chuckling on the other end of the line.

"Man-whore?" Ana asked questioningly as she thought about who Kate was referring to… _Jack?_

"Christian…you said he bought the company, didn't he?" Kate clarified.

 _Oh. She had led Kate to believe the night before that he had only been interested in sex._

"Yes, he was there, but that isn't what I was going to say." She said quickly, "Mister McFeely _resigned_ , and I've been asked to stand in as acting Senior Editor!"

"Holy fuck! Did you report him for sexual Harassment or something?" Kate asked.

Ana bit her lip knowing how this was going to sound, "No, Christian actually suggested that he resign."

There was a beat of silence, "Wait…Christian _fired_ him?"

"Not exactly, no…he suggested that he resign immediately unless he wanted to be caught up in a sexual harassment lawsuit. Apparently there had been 3 other assistants before me who Jack pulled this crap with."

Kate whistled, "I'm liking the man-whore a bit more already."

"Kate!" Ana said chuckling, "He's really not a man-whore. He took me out for lunch today actually, and well…he's still interested in me, even though I cut our date short the other night."

"Ana, sweetie, just because he didn't fuck you over the appetizer, doesn't mean he's not a man-whore. I can almost guarantee that man has had more pussy than a crazy cat lady."

Ana sighed. Kate was unfortunately, probably right. Where she'd never even _seen_ a cock in person, she'd bet he was a vajay-jay connoisseur.

"Just be careful, okay? I know I said earlier that you should go for it, but I don't want you to end up just being his booty call. You deserve more than that." Kate told her honestly.

"I'll be fine, Kate, I'm made of _Steele_ , remember?" Ana chuckled. That had been their joke through college; that Ana was indestructible with a last name like Steele.

"Don't I know it. Just…take it at your own pace, ok? Congrats on the promotion though, we're definitely going out for drinks to celebrate when you get your butt back home!"

"As long as you're buyin!" Ana laughed, "Night Kate, talk soon."

 **ooOo0oOoo**

The next morning, she left her flat early to make her usual morning stop at Starbucks on her way to Random House. She ordered two coffees out of habit before she realized that she was no longer responsible for fetching Jack his morning coffee. Rather than cancelling the order, she nibbled her bottom lip and pulled out her phone

 _ **How do you take your coffee?**_

Her phone chimed a minute later and she blushed when she saw his message

 _ **Hot, and full of cream… ;)**_

She tapped a reply back into her phone, trying to bite back a smirk.

 _ **Is that code? Because I feel like that's code…**_

Rather than send an actual reply, Christian sent her a winking emoji.

Taking his message literally, she got the Barista's attention, "Hey Antonella? Would you mind making that second coffee a latte with extra whip?"

"Uh…sure" Antonella raised her eyebrows at the unusual coffee order, but made it as requested.

By the time Ana reached her office, she realized she had no idea where _Christian's_ office was. Feeling like a complete moron, she dropped her coat and bag onto her chair, and headed down the hall with two coffees in hand looking for any sign of Christian.

She had just rounded the corner when he stepped out of one of the conference rooms right in front of her almost knocking her over.

"Shit!" she yelped without thinking nearly spilling the coffee everywhere. He caught her arms quickly to steady her, biting back a smirk at her reaction.

"Are you quite alright?" he asked taking the coffee from her outstretched hand as she blushed a deep shade of crimson.

"I'm fine, you just startled me. Sorry for the um…" she dropped her voice to a whisper and looked around quickly to make sure no one was nearby who might take offense, "…shit"

Christian chuckled in amusement as he took a sip of his coffee, and looked down in confusion as he noticed the copious amounts of whipped cream.

"Hot and full of cream, as requested." Ana smirked as she raised her own coffee to her lips

Christian choked and she bit her lip trying not to laugh as one of the other senior editors walked by and asked Christian if he was alright, even going so far as to pat him on the back a few times until Christian held up his hand to signal that he was indeed, fine.

As soon as he walked away, Christian quirked an eyebrow at her and said just low enough for her to hear, "You're going to pay for that, Miss Steele."

Something about the way he said it made her whole body flush with desire, and she sucked her bottom lip between her teeth as she glanced up at him from beneath her lashes in a way she knew would drive him crazy, and whispered, "I'm looking forward to it, Mister Grey."


End file.
